


Hero

by duskri123



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-07
Updated: 2012-06-07
Packaged: 2017-11-07 04:52:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/427087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/duskri123/pseuds/duskri123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To some it's just a title. To others it's a guilty reminder. Even so, every hero has one of their own. Companion for Two.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hero

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended. The Twilight Saga and all recognizable characters, settings, ect. are the property of their respective owners. I am in no way affiliated with them. 
> 
> Beta'd by JaspersDestiny

2002

"Why?" my father asked from his seat in the living room. He had been silent during my entire explanation, not even bothering to come into the kitchen as I spoke to my mother. "God knows you – like most everyone else your damn age – lack ambition, so why now?"

My old man was just that – old. Old fashioned, old in age, just plain fuckin' old. And I was positive he thought I was the most disappointing thing to ever grace his presence, next to my sister, Rose. Nothing we ever did made him smile. Even the day I walked across the stage to graduate, he only grunted and walked away.

And poor Rose. She was already four months pregnant with Em's kid, about to walk down the aisle, and our dad was even trying to refuse his given right of giving her away to her husband. All because she was pregnant.

Oh, yeah, like we were the disappointments!

My mother wiped at her face with her palms, removing the stained tears that had covered her cheeks during my explanation. I didn't want to hurt her but I was her boy, her baby. She didn't want to see me leave, let alone see my go to war. What mother did?

"David, don't start," she warned quietly. "Regardless of how we feel, this is, in a way, a good thing for Jasper."

He snorted and his chair creaked as he lifted his weight from it and came to lean against the wood frame of the entryway that separated the rooms. "A good thing, huh?" He scoffed. "So that's why you've got them tears rolling down your cheeks like you're so proud, Nanny?"

"I am!" she shot back, cheeks turning pink as I closed my eyes and dropped my head into my hands.

"I call some kind of bullshit, woman."

"Dad," I groaned. "Just... fuckin' stop, okay?"

"Jasper!" my mother admonished. I rarely used foul language within the house, but sometimes it just called for it.

"Listen to your mother, boy."

My teeth grinded behind closed lips to hide the anger. "I'm doing it because I want to, because it's right."

"Whatta ya think you're going to be when you get back, son, some kind of hero or something?" he asked, followed by a bark of a laugh. "No, you'll get your shit done that you need to here, then they'll send you over there and then nothing. You think that's going to make you a man, Jasper? Wearing the garb, speaking the creed, and holding that gun? That won't make you no man, son."

"I am already a man," I snapped back.

He scoffed under his breath again. "A man. All of twenty years old and the boy already knows he's seen all, been all, and done all. God knows you ain't got a thing to learn."

I turned around in my chair so fast the legs scratched loudly against the hard wood floors. "So what would make you proud, Dad? Because God knows nothing I've ever done has!"

His eyes hardened at my words. "Is that what this is about? Me? Don't make this about me, Jasper."

I sneered before standing up and grabbing my keys off the table where I had set them when I came in. "It's not about you, Dad. So let's not make it into that. This is about me and what I want. I tried school after I graduated; it wasn't for me. I've worked every day since I quit and I paid my way without asking for a lick of your damned help, but it's not getting me anywhere but ten cent raises and a fuckin' cubicle. This is me, Dad. It's me making something of myself and I don't give a shit if you like it or not."

I didn't bother to listen to the aftermath of my outburst. I was already running out the front door and jumping into my 95' Chevy pickup truck before the door had even closed. The engine roared and I shifted the gears, grinding them and not even caring that I was just too fuckin' pissed to drive at that moment. The streets passed, the houses flying by, and the sky was dark. The tires screeched against slick pavement as I turned down that familiar road.

It was late, so crazy fuckin' late at night, but she'd be up. She always was.

The truck rolled to a quick stop and I was out of the truck's cab before the engine even stopped spinning. I bent down and grabbed a handful of dirt off the ground before throwing it at the window I knew was hers. Her wavy brown hair saturated my vision as she opened the window. And just like that, my anger was gone, only to be replaced by the absolute adoration I held for the seventeen year old girl who managed to make me do just about anything she wanted just by saying my name.

"What are you doing here?" she asked with a small laugh.

"Come on, Bella, let's go for a drive," I replied, grinning and turning back to walk to the truck.

I practically felt her eyes burning into my back. "I've got exams. School is out in less than two months, Jasper."

I bit the side of my cheek, turning back to look at her from the side of my vision and tilting my head in a mocking way. "Oh come on, babe, live a little," I taunted. "Is that all you're gonna do is study the rest of your life? You're not gonna make no time for me? That sounds like a horrible plan to me, babe. I wanna party."

She huffed before slamming her window shut. I ran back over to my truck and climbed inside, leaning over to roll down her passenger side window for her. I knew she'd come; she always did. As I leaned back up, Renee Dwyer's form walked across the dampened grass toward me. I froze for a millisecond, looking behind her to see if Phil was anywhere in sight. Renee was . Careful and watchful, but she loved me. Phil, well, he was a little different when it came to me. It seemed like since Bella's father lived so far away and they'd been separated from the time she was little, Phil took it upon herself to be the next in line to fill that spot. Sure, Bella loved the guy, but he wasn't her dad.

"Phil's working late tonight, Jasper," Renee told me with a knowing smile as she leaned into the passenger window.

"Hi, ma'am." I smiled.

"I thought we made this clear, Jasper," she said with a fake frown.

"What would that be?"

"Oh, for God's sake, boy! It's ten at night and the least you could do is knock. One of these days, you're going to break that damn window because you pick up a stone instead of dirt, and then what are you going to do?"

I grinned as Bella walked out the front door. Yeah, her momma sure did like me. "Well, I'd buy you a new one and put it in."

Her finger pointed at me mockingly. "Oh, don't forget the chat you'd have with Phil…"

I grimaced. "Yeah."

"Be a good boy and knock on the front door. I know your mother taught you better than that," she scolded.

"Sorry, ma'am," I said, chuckling.

"And stop calling me ma'am; that sounds so old," she muttered before turning around and walking over to where Bella was watching us nervously from a few feet away. "Home by twelve, Bella."

"Okay, Mom," Bella responded with a smile and a wink at me before giving Renee a kiss on the cheek and running over to my truck, pulling herself inside and slamming the door harder than necessary. "So..." she trailed off, watching her mother walk back around the side of the house. "A party, huh?"

I bit my tongue at her words. "Just for us," I clarified with a wink before starting up the truck and spinning off.

The smile on my face didn't once leave as I watched the beautiful girl beside me hang her arm out the window to feel the wind whip against her arm and through her fingers. Brown tendrils of hair covered her cheeks and face as she turned to look at me, the wind blowing the scent of her strawberry shampoo my way.

"Where are we going anyway?" she finally asked.

"Uh..." I muttered to myself. I hadn't thought about it really; I'd just wanted to see her. "The beach?"

She gave me a look that said she knew something was up. "I thought you wanted a party?"

I smirked and my hand found purchase on her thigh before I gripped tight to the exposed flesh. I loved when she wore those little shorts. "You're always my party, Bella."

Instinctively her muscles in her thighs twitched beneath my fingers. Yeah, I planned on having those same thighs wrapped around my waist later too. Her ragged breath made me smile but the silence fuckin' said it all. The girl was my damn party, every single time.

"I thought you were visiting your parents tonight?" she said as I pulled into the sandy road that led to the parking lot of the beach.

My eyes narrowed as I continued to stare ahead before I removed my hand and gripped the shift once more. "Got cut short," I replied tightly.

Her smile faded. "Why?"

I shrugged and pulled the truck into the nearly vacant lot. Only a couple cars and a few bicycles remained. Not many people hung out on the beach this late – too many, and the cops would come poking around and asking questions. It wasn't a place for public partying.

"Dad didn't like what I had to say."

She looked at me, confused. I hadn't told her yet; really I didn't know how. Fuck, I loved the girl like crazy and this was going to tear her apart. "What do you mean?" she asked me softly.

"Later, okay? Right now, let's just chill and watch the waves," I mumbled before unbuckling my seat belt and leaning back further in my seat.

She only nodded before doing the same with her belt, turning so she was leaning against the door, her hair hanging out the window, and lifting up her flip flop clad feet before placing them in my lap. Her head turned and I watched her silently as she stared out at the blackened sky and crashing waves of the tide.

Goddamn she was beautiful.

And I was gonna miss her so much.

My hand that was resting on the curve of the door gripped hard against the handle before I turned the knob and opened the door. She looked back at me with a raised eyebrow in question and surprise.

"Come on," I muttered, pushing her legs from my lap and stepping out of the truck before leaning back in and grabbing my keys. I rolled up the window as she rolled up hers. We locked the doors and shut them before I pointed at the trails alongside the beach that led to more quiet and secluded areas. "You want to walk a while?"

"Sure." She smiled before coming to stand by my side. I pulled her close, kissing her hair and taking in that sweet scent once more. "Love you," I heard her mumble.

"I love you too," I whispered against her hair.

We walked silently along the trails, keeping close enough to the beach until we were so far in that no one could be seen anywhere near us.

Her feet travelled in the tides. I laughed as she shivered but her eyes glimmered with happiness. Black, diamond studded flip flops dangled from her fingertips as she walked another couple feet into the water, stopping when it came to her waist. "You coming in?" she asked me with a teasing tone. Before I could answer, she tossed her flip flops as far as she could behind her, far from where the tide could catch them.

I continued to stare, a little mesmerized as the tiny white tank top was pulled over her shoulders and tossed as well. Pale shoulders glistened in the moonlight, her head tilting back to stare at me before her hands reached back and unclasped the back of the pale pink bra she was wearing. I was going to Hell for her, I knew it, but I was so ready for those flames.

"Jas?"

"Fuck," I groaned before toeing off my boots, fumbling with my belt, and yanking off my pants. The shirt I was wearing was lost to the sand as well before my skin hit the water full force. I was under the small waves, grabbing on to her legs and pulling her under with me. We hit the surface, laughter shattering the silence that had surrounded us for a short time. It was short lived though; her fingers travelled the light coloured hair along my stomach before I watched her fingers disappear beneath the boxers I hadn't bothered to take off. I repeated my earlier sentiment as her fingers wrapped around the place I wanted her to be most. "Fuck!"

...

My fingers trailed along Bella's naked hips as I revelled in the feel of her chest pushing against mine with every breath she took in. Her body was sprawled over mine, hands crossed on my chest and cheek pressed to her hands as her eyes watched the tide roll in once more, the water barely reaching us. I leaned up and kissed her shoulder, tasting the salt and sand on my tongue. I didn't even care; it tasted like the sweetest of sugars on her skin.

"I enlisted," I whispered so quietly I was sure she hadn't heard me. But I felt her body tense against mine before her fingers grasped onto my chest and she pushed herself up enough that she could look me in the eyes. "Just hear me out."

Her head shook. "No, I don't think I heard you right the first time."

"I enlisted," I repeated.

"Shut the fuck up!" she hissed, her lip quivering before her hand slapped against my chest. Bella never swore; not aloud anyway. She was pissed. "Just shut the fuck up!"

"Bella, please just listen to me for a damned minute," I shouted as she pulled herself away from me and started grabbing at her clothes that littered the sandy beach. "I needed to do something other than just this! I want to be something!"

She stopped, turning back to look at me with tears streaking across her cheeks. "So go back to school, Jasper! Be a fucking lawyer or a doctor! Not a soldier!"

I sighed, running my hands through my hair in aggravation. "I don't want to do that. I never did. I want to be important for once. I want to be someone!"

She stopped pulling on her clothes, her shoulders shaking with the sobs she was releasing. I felt the wetness of my own tears crisscrossing my cheeks as I moved over to her. I couldn't get close enough though – every time I came near her her hand would shoot out and she'd move a little farther away. She was breaking my fuckin' heart.

"God, you didn't even care, did you? You probably never even loved me! This was all just fun and stupid for you, right? I'm the young, dumb, pretty girl who followed the older boy into whatever he wanted and just look where it fucking got me! Fuck, I hate you!"

"You know I love you," I snarled out. "Don't say that. Christ, I'll be back! It won't be for that long, Bella!" She shook her head frantically, tugging up her shorts and clasping the three buttons on them before turning away to leave. "Don't just fuckin' leave me like this, babe!"

She didn't turn back; instead she broke into a jog back through the trails through which we had arrived. I pulled on my dry jeans as quickly as I could, not even bothering with my shirt or boots or even bothering to button up the pants, before I took off at a fast run after her. I caught up to her within seconds, wrapping my arms tightly around her waist and pulling her back flush to my chest as she screamed and sobbed, her fists hitting against my chest as she turned and curled into me.

"God, Jasper! Why?" she cried. "You promised you wouldn't do that to me!"

"It's the right thing to do," I replied calmly, my lips pressing against her wet hair. "I'm sorry."

Her anger was back and she screamed at me again, trying to force her weight out of my arms. I wasn't letting her go just yet. Her hand reached up and a fist struck against the bottom of my jaw hard. Never once in my life had I hit a woman, and I never would, but right then I wanted to grab her shoulders and shake her until her teeth rattled for that hit.

"Stop!" I yelled at her.

"No, let me go!" she screamed back before another fist hit me. "God, you idiot. You're not even old enough to buy a bottle of whiskey but you're old enough to carry that fucking gun for them and kill for it? What, do you think that's going to make you some kind of hero?"

At those words I stumbled back from her, feeling as if my father were standing there repeating his earlier words to me again.

"Don't," I warned her.

"Fuck you," she spat. "I hate you."

2008

I lay in the hospital bed, bandaged and damaged. I'd done one tour – four years required by the infantry. I'd gained my rank of Corporal in those years, took my leave for three months, and then signed right back up for another tour of eighteen months in Iraq. I didn't even care; it wasn't like I had anything at home to keep me there. Dad had died a month into my training. Mom was still alive and kicking, hard, but the look in her eyes when she saw me leave again wasn't something I wanted to see again. Rose had Parker – sweet fuckin' kid – and that was great too. But none of it made me want to stay. Not a single thing.

She had refused to speak to me. Bella. That name still stung like acid on my tongue. I had left two weeks after I told her and I never had the chance to apologize or say goodbye. There were no phone calls, no letters, nothing. Just like that. That girl killed me and I let her do it.

The sounds of leather boots walking across the tile floor had me turning my head – with great pain – to see who was approaching my room. He walked in, head high in full army garb – stars, stripes and all. I didn't know his name but the emblem on his uniform told me his rank. I didn't even bother to smile.

What was he here to say?

You did good? You're going home? You're of no use to us anymore? All of that?

Fuck it, I didn't even care.

"Jasper Whitlock," he said with a tight smile as he eyed my chart on the table before picking it up and thumbing through what was inside. "Or do you prefer Corporal Whitlock right now?"

"I don't care," I croaked in pain. Fuck the world, where was that bitch with the morphine?

He stared at me for a minute and I watched the green in his eyes swim. The memory hit again, just like that, at the simple trigger of the color of his eyes. Peter was yelling for me, O'Hara was being backed into another room. Shots ringing in my ears, the smell of smoke, blood, and gun powder filling my nostrils. It was only supposed to be a routine search, standard in and out, nothing like that.

I saw the boy move out from the corner of a dark closet, rifle raised and ready as he aimed straight for the only best friend I had left. I shouted Peter's name. Fuck, the kid was only maybe twelve. My rifle rose without me really realizing it. Could I kill a fuckin' kid? A kid?

My rifle fired just as a searing hot pain scored through my shoulder, my body snapping forward from the force of the bullet ripping through the flesh and bone. Another pain ripped into the side of my neck and red poured as I screamed out in pain. I never saw the one behind me but Peter did. I watched the firing shots explode from his rifle as blood spilled from my mouth and I hit the floor hard.

I could hear them calling my name; feel them staunching the wounds, a needle being driven into my skin.

Kill me.

"You saved me, Jas," Peter muttered as he helped the others carry me.

"Corporal?"

I ignored the voice, still seeing the deep green.

"Corporal!"

I was shoved back into reality, fists clenched and body shaking. "Yeah," I rasped out.

"I'm here to give you your orders and papers. We're sending you home, for good."

I just stared at him. Who cared? "Huh," was my only response.

His eyebrow rose and he smirked down at me. "You should be proud son; you're a hero."

2009

I walked into TaleGaterz, breathing in the heady scent of sweat and alcohol. Peter's waving hand caught my attention immediately. He had finished his tour and was taking a year leave before signing up for another. Apparently his wife was pregnant again; it'd be their third. He lived two states away but Char told him to take a week to come stay with me and visit. We never got the chance since the accident in Iraq.

"Hey, man," he grinned.

I had given him directions to the place early in the day, knowing I'd have to help out my mom for most of the day and Peter wanted to get out and see the town. I wasn't going to hold him back. "Hey," I replied, sitting down and waving for the girl who was doing her round for orders.

"What are you drinking, Jasper?" she asked as she made her way over to our corner booth. "The usual?"

I hummed a low note. "Jack Daniels, Courtney."

"And your friend?"

"Same," Peter said with a smile before leaning back farther into his chair and flinging his arm around the back of the booth. As she walked away, Peter shot me a look and waggled his eyebrows suggestively. "She's cute," he remarked.

"Sure, sure," I responded dully. "So are half the other women in this bar."

"Girls like our type." He chuckled.

My nose scrunched slightly. "Yeah."

Two shot glasses and a bottle of Jack slid across the table. I smirked up at the girl and she winked, saying it would be put on my tab, before leaving again with hips swaying.

Peter laughed low. "She's got an eye on you."

"She's also got a boyfriend who tends the bar," I explained with a coy smile.

"Damn."

Music blared throughout the bar; bodies dancing, people laughing. Still, I was just bored. Peter poured the shots and we slammed them back one after another. Within an hour, half the bottle was gone and both Peter and I had made our way to the pool tables to play.

He pour me another shot and one for himself, handing it across the table to me before tipping his glass at me and muttering, 'Hooah,' under his breath. "Hooah," I said thickly before slamming the shot back. It burned so harsh but felt so good at the same time.

I eventually made my way outside to the back alleyway, needing space from the heat and noise of the bar. Peter had found another man willing to lose his money on a pool game to play with him while I had my cigarette. The cool air hit me harshly, making the liquor start rushing in my veins all at once. I felt like air. I pulled the pack of Marlboro Reds from my pocket and leaned against the brick wall as I lit it up and took a deep drag.

The click of heels on pavement had me turning my head. Courtney smiled and gave a little wave as she closed the back door to the bar. She was pretty; her brown hair reminded me of someone else's that I was still trying to forget.

"What's up?" she asked as she pulled out her own cigarettes and lit one up. Pink lips wrapped the filter and I licked along the line of my own.

"It was getting a bit loud."

Her eyes travelled my form and my eyebrow rose at her blatant display of interest. She moved closer, hand reaching out to touch the tags I still wore around my neck. "The Army, huh? So what they all say is true. Whitlock."

My eyebrow cocked again. "And what do they all say?"

Her tiny fingers touched along the line of the scar visible on my neck. It burned at the touch. I snapped my head away and she smiled at the display. "They say you got hurt saving a bunch of other people."

I snorted despite myself. "Actually, it was one; only one."

Her lips curled into a sensual smile, fingers travelling along my leather jacket before her fingers clenched tightly to the material. My eyes dropped, travelling the length of her bare legs right up to the tiny skirt she was wearing. I traced the curve of her hip with one finger.

"Still makes you a hero," she whispered.

Before I had let out a breath, I grabbed her and pinned her to the dirty brick wall. My lips attacked her neck, my fingers pushing the material of her skirt up around her hips, and I nipped and bit her skin roughly. I cupped her ass – nothing on but a thong – and picked her up, letting her legs wrap around my waist before shoving her into the wall once more. Her tiny gasps of air and moans urged me onward and I continued, dragging my lips against her skin before stopping at her ear. I hissed the words so quickly I wasn't sure she heard me. But she had.

"So, baby, you want to fuck a hero?"

...

Peter left four days later. The house was empty again, bare – too quiet. I fuckin' drowned myself in alcohol for two months. It was numbing; nothing mattered when there was nothing but a burn and a haze to fill my days. It wasn't like I had anything to care about. I had no family, no children, no wife – the only one I'd wanted, I'd never seen again. The army didn't want me; the shot through my shoulder had fucked that bone up to the point where I couldn't carry the weight of a gun on it for longer than twenty minutes without it near killing me with pain.

It didn't take long for Emmett and Rosalie to hear word from Mom that I hadn't been coming around; that I hadn't even been calling.

Em slammed my front door open so hard it cracked the wall when it hit. He found me sitting on the couch, watching some re-run and drinking a bottle of Jack straight. The man might have been younger than me but he could be just as terrifying too. One of his large hands grabbed the bottle from me before I even managed to move my ass. His other hand clenched into a fist and slammed into my jaw, knocking me straight onto the dirty floor and sending me rolling ten feet.

"Get the fuck up!" he shouted at me. "Get the fuck up, clean your shit up, get dressed and get out of this house. Your mother is crying, your sister is bitching, and your nephew keeps asking where the Hell you are. Don't make me tell him his uncle is too fucking drunk to give a shit about him. This isn't you, Jas. You're better than this." His hands waved at me before the bottle in his hand slammed onto my hardwood floors, shattering and spilling around both our feet.

"Jesus," I muttered.

His blue eyes met mine. "Parker wants you to coach his soccer team. So get the fuck up and let's go."

How the Hellcould I say no?

2012

And there she was – brown hair, chocolate eyes, and shaking hands. I had to occupy my own hands with a cigarette to keep from doing the same. Why was she here? I'd tried contacting her but Renee had said she'd contact me if she wanted to. What did she want from me? Fuck, I was just starting to be okay and it took a decade to do it.

She asked about the wound. What could I say?

Only two.

Her name – Bella – felt like a ghost passing my lips. I hadn't said it in so long – too long.

We talked for hours about the army, my house, her mom, where she went to school. She sat on my front porch steps like that was right where she belonged, and Goddamn it, my heart hurt at the sight.

I'd never held out hope for a relationship because of that woman and there she was. Shaking fuckin' hands and all. Why was she so nervous? Why was I? I had wanted to touch her, smell her, kiss her…and it was so wrong. She was still beautiful, even at twenty-seven with the tiny lines at the edges of her eyes.

I watched her make her way down the walkway back to the car she had said was Renee's.

I called her name and she turned back to me. "Don't leave this time without saying goodbye," I whispered but knew she had heard.

Her red lips curved into a smile. The tags hidden beneath my shirt shook from the slight tremors in my body. "Not this time, Jas."

...

I called Rose, knowing she lived right there where Bella was. "Why didn't you tell me she was in town?" I yelled into the receiver.

"Parker, sit down and eat your supper! Emmett, turn off that television!" Rose snapped at the people on the other end before turning her attention back to me. "Why would it have mattered, Jas? You'd have probably hidden yourself away anyway."

"Fuck you, I would not have," I growled, hand slamming down on my countertop.

"Oh, don't cuss!" she said, sounding bored. "Oh, by the way, Em needs you to come help him fix a hole in the roof on Wednesday. Can you do that?"

Why was she trying to change the subject? "Didn't you just have the roof re-done?"

I could almost imagine her shrugging her shoulders. "I don't know. God I am tired. Parker, eat! Emmett, television! NOW! Jas, yes or no?"

Oh my God, if she started screaming at me like that, I'd never be going over. In that moment I couldn't have been gladder for missing the whole first pregnancy she had with Parker.

"Yeah, sure, whatever. Wednesday."

"Great, bye, love you," she blew out in one breath before I heard the dial tone in my ear.

Goddamn it.

...

I hated her. I hated Bella for doing this to me. I hated Rosalie for keeping it from me. I hated Renee for not telling me. I wanted to junk punch Emmett for not being a man and calling me as soon as he knew.

But sweet Jesus, I loved that little girl. I didn't even have to see her eyes to know she was mine. When I saw her face, I was looking at the same one I had seen every day staring back in a mirror. Even her fuckin' hair curled and shone like mine.

Oh God, she was mine.

I was a father.

She was my daughter.

I had a child.

And she was so crazy beautiful.

But those eyes, they were mine too... Even the flecks of dark blue inside the rimmed color were mine.

I sat in the emergency room as Bella and Kalewent through a simple check-up with the on-call doctor to make sure she had no damage or concussion. Rosalie sat across from me, rubbing her stomach and smiling at me like she'd just won the lottery. Em was entertaining Parker with the television.

"You're a wretched fuckin' bitch, Rose," I told her.

"I just found out too," she replied with a sly grin.

"You should have told me as soon as you knew. That is my–" I choked on the word.

"Child, baby, girl, daughter. Say it," she said. "She's yours."

"Oh my God," I repeated out loud.

"Mom is going to be so happy," Rose said, smiling at me.

"I have a child," I whispered.

...

That beach was such a beautiful comfort. I watched her run along the dark tide of water, blonde curls flying out from behind her. She told me about her favourite food, music, sports and shows.

She liked vanilla but loved chocolate.

She was allergic to bees.

Her favourite class was gym.

She thought boys were stupid unless they could kick a soccer ball.

Parker and Edward were cool.

Alice was hyper.

Her mom was her everything.

She missed her grandpa.

She wanted me to love her... because she'd loved me for so long even if she was too young to understand why I never did.

When I hit my bed that night, I cried. I hadn't cried in years, but I cried hard and it felt so good.

A knock broke me out of my moment and I made my way to the front door. Bella was behind the screen when I opened it, hair mussed, hands shaking and eyes red.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just... Jasper I didn't know what to do. She was my everything. And, fuck, I thought you would be happy doing what you wanted. She was so happy when I picked her up."

Before I understood my actions, I grabbed her shoulders hard and kissed her forehead, hugging her tight. "Thank you," I murmured against her flushed skin. "Thank you for her."

2013

The day her mother died, I carried her to my car and drove her home. Nothing I said made the tears stop; nothing could be her comfort. When I placed her in her bed, her fingers grabbed on to the fabric of my shirt and she refused to let go. I found myself hurting for her – because she hurt so badly for everything else.

Bella wet my shirt with tears.

She smelled like the hospital's sanitizer.

My damn heart was breaking again.

And she kissed me. It wasn't soft; it was need and desire. Hands grabbed and pulled at clothes, hair was tugged and pulled. Tears poured through pain. She still tasted like strawberries and her skin still felt like silk against my fingers, even with the marks across her stomach that showed how much of a woman she really was and what she had given to carry my child.

She couldn't forget but I helped her to numb it.

And sweet fuck… I wanted it, so I took it.

2017

I watched my wife stare at the papers in front of her. It had never been her; it was always me.

"Do you know what this means?" she asked me quietly.

"It means I don't have the fuckin' sperm, Bella," I snapped bitterly.

"No, Jas, that isn't what I meant!"

Well that's what it sure as hell meant to me. It meant I wasn't a good enough man to give my wife what she wanted. It meant something was fuckin' wrong with me. It meant I'd never have the chance to hold an infant that was purely mine and hers in my arms.

Bella had gone through all her tests, even the most invasive and terrible, to see if it was her. All I had to do was come in a cup.

And it was all my fault.

"They gave us the option of using another man's," I said to her. "If that's a route you want to go down, then we can do that."

Her head snapped up, papers falling from her hands as she looked at me shocked. "No."

"What?" I asked confused. "I thought you wanted another child, babe?"

She nodded and pointed to the papers lying on the table. "I do, but I want them with you... Not that way, and not with treatments and more tests."

"But–"

"No," she interrupted me loudly. "Do you know what this means?" I only looked at her, defeated, and I let you a breath of air before she spoke again. "It means Kale is an absolute miracle, Jas. It means even with the birth control pills, she was still created. It means you can make children."

"The doctor said–"

She gave a tiny scream of anger before standing up and moving over to me, pointing her finger into my chest hard. "I know what he said; I just read the damn reports. Sure, you have a lower than terrible sperm count, and many that are there aren't healthy enough to thrive, but it only takes one, Jasper, just one. Kale was one. We'll have another child."

2019

We had managed to find a doctor willing to allow Bella to have a natural birth without another c-section so long as everything went as planned and they felt it would continue that way. Kale opted out of the birthing room, instead sitting out in the waiting room with Edward.

I hated that boy. He loved my girl. I knew he'd marry her someday and I hated him for it.

Bella progressed; the baby was monitored. I sat in the fuckin' chair in the corner unless she wanted me to move. I learned with that first contraction it was better to do as she asked and she'd scream a fuck lot less. But my God, I loved my wife for this.

It was fascinating watching her breathe, hearing her soft groans. She was in pain, and that fact hurt me, but it was such an incredible thing. That first cry Jacob let loose from his lungs sent my heart spinning. I adored him – loved him – immediately. Even bloodied, angry and scary he was my everything.

Kale slammed through the hospital doors, having not been able to contain herself in the waiting room for longer than an hour anyway. Nearly seventeen but almost all grown up, my little girl cried. We did too. I kissed my wife's tear stained cheeks, brushing hair from her face and tasting her salty sweat on my lips.

I loved her more than anything.

She gave me everything.

She cradled our newborn son to her chest as my lips found heaven against her own. The doctor and nurses did their work. Kale slowly crept forward.

I whispered low so only she would hear me, "You're my hero."


End file.
